The Tribute

"Even If she said something like - let's go to the Temple, it would sound erotic"
~ Balu Mahendra on "Silk-oo" Smitha

Being hit by a Thunderbolt ...

Dissolve To: Sicilian countryside. Young village girls pick flowers and sing. Unaware of Michael, Fabrizio and Calo watching them. One of the girls, Apollonia, is startled when she sees Michael. After an exchange of looks, Apollonia turns and walks away, saying something in Italian.

Fabrizio [In Italian]: Mama mia what a beauty
Apollonia [Something in Sicilian]
Fabrizio (to Michael, who can't keep his eyes off Apollonia): Oh -- I think you got hit by the thunderbolt
Calo (poking Michael's shoulder)[In Italian]: Michele -- In Sicily, women are more dangerous than shotguns (Apollonia turns to look at Michael)

Dissolve To: A small village cafe. We hear "Sicilian Pastorale." The owner, Vitelli, after yelling something into the kitchen, welcomes the guests, who are seating themselves at a table.

Vitelli [In Italian]: Did you have a good hunt?
Fabrizio [In Italian]: You know all the girls around here? We saw some real beauties ... (then, after Vitelli smiles) ... One of them struck our friend like a thunderbolt
Fabrizio [In Italian]: She would tempt the devil himself
Calo [In Italian]: ... tempt the devil ...
Vitelli (gesturing "put together" with his fingers) [Something like, in Italian]: Ah, I understand -- really put together...
Fabrizio [In Italian]: Really put together, eh Calo?
Calo [In Italian]: ...together
Vitelli (gesturing an ideal female form with his hands)
Fabrizio [In Italian]: Such hair -- such mouth!
Calo: A bocca...
Vitelli [In Italian]: Ah, the girls around here are beautiful -- but virtuous, ah?
Fabrizio [In Italian]: This one had a purple dress -- and a purple ribbon in her hair
Calo [In Italian]: ... a purple ribbon ...
Fabrizio [In Italian]: ... a type more Greek than Italian
Calo: Piu Greca d'Italiana
Fabrizio [In Italian]: Do you know her?
Vitelli (curtly)[In Italian]: No! -- There's no girl like that in this town! (Vitelli turns and enters the cafe, yelling)
Fabrizio (gets up to look into cafe) [In Italian]: My God, I understand!
Michael (to Calo) [In Italian]: What's wrong?
Fabrizio (returns, after Calo shrugs, to collect his things) [In Italian]: Let's go -- it's his daughter

Have any of you been hit by a thunderbolt ? Tell me your story ...

Saala Madraasi ...

A lot of us often think of the Tamilians as a race with militant ideas and a misplacced sense of Dravidian/Tamil nationalism. To a large extent, this is because of the language struggle, where they genuinely believed Tamil to be a 'logical' alternative to Hindi and the fight for an independent Dravidian homeland, that consisted of Tamil Nadu and northern Srilanka. Now, consider this:

1. MG Ramachandran was a mallu Nair from Palakkad
2. Rajinikanth (Shivaji Rao Gaekwad) is a Marathi from Bangalore
3. Jayalalitha is a kannadiga from Mysore
4. Khushboo and Simran are Hindi speaking. Incidentally both of them have temples constructed for them in Tamil Nadu.
5. Thyagaraja who wrote the Pancharatna kritis was a Telugu based out of Tanjore

Sure for every MGR we have a Kaurnanidhi, and for every khushboo and a Simran we have a Radha and Radhika, but the dichotomy for me seems too sharp to understand for them to fit the cliche. How can a race that is believed to be so gung-ho about it's identity continuously elevate people from outside to the pedestal. So are they miltant, confused souls with a bit of an identity crisis or more liberal than we make them out to be ?

Racist South Indians

I've always called myself a Racist South Indian. I've often been asked what that means and my definition has always changed every single time I've tried to respond (based on my mood, state of mind and a host of other things that included the price of onions) ... This is my attempt to be consistent ...

Racist South Indian
- Noun (Usage: I was eating Mutton Madras and bloody hell ... I realised I was a Racist South Indian)
1. A bunch of like minded people who dig thunder thighed actresses, prefer moustaches on their heroes (and heroines given a choice). They can gorge on dosas, vadas, MLA pesarattus and bisibela baths 3 times a day, think that Amitabh Bacchan (who is he?) comes a close 29th after Rajini, Chiru, Upendra (not necessarily in the same order) and a bunch of other pot-bellied and not so pot-bellied actors. They believe that Article 343 (Hindi as a national language) should be scrapped or ammended and filter coffee goes best while reading The Hindu